Marriage is meant to shine. To be the origin of unique passion and aliveness between two lovers and soul-mates. Where individuality is honored and rich togetherness is cultivated. So often this fails to happen and couples eventually turn the corner where hurt, misunderstandings and wounds abound. Clearly the exception to God’s design for synergy and joy between two people who inspire one another.

Too many couples who experience marital struggles have fallen well below this experience. And some have sunk into challenges that have become destructive and harmful to the spirit and soul – of both! Not just poor communication or the usual suspects such as disagreement over finances, in-laws, etc. More tragic – problems honoring one another as unique human beings, who need to feel secure, loved and even cherished in the bonds of marriage.

This can happen for many reasons. Needs go unmet over time, attention to growing the marriage doesn’t take place and the thought of rocking one another’s world fades into a distant memory – often completely forgotten. When hurt and wounded, it gets easier to withhold love, to strike back and attack emotionally. Sometimes affairs grow from this neglected soil and add to the challenges of finding solutions – and moving ahead as lovers united as one.